For Long in Dreams
by PhoenixRising143
Summary: Song Fic. Harry and Hermione share something special. But not everything is what it seems.


I write purely for my own enjoyment, thus this is edited only by me. I do not make any money from this story, nor do I claim any ownership for the characters and song involved in the story. They are the property of their respective owners… one of which I am not.

The title of this story comes from the poem_ The wondrous moment of our meeting… _by Alexander Pushkin

..oOo..

She remembered that night with a ferocious clarity. Every moment flashed through her mind like the slides from old movies her father used to play on his rusty old projector. Hermione Granger couldn't bear to forget That Night for that was is was called in her mind simply because she knew, in her heart of hearts, that those events were never to be repeated.

_Tugged the moon into the ground_

_Turned this bedroom upside down tonight_

Each time she recollected that sultry summer night, she was left wanting, aching. Not from desire, per say, though there was plenty of that too. She ached for Him. Harry.

_Took my faith and I breathed it out_

_Then walked right through a cloud of flashing lights_

_Bright lies._

Each day she woke up from dreams of silken sheets, moist with sweat, dewy skin fused together in the most intimate, and yet simple way. She saw scorching emerald eyes, His eyes, gazing from above her. There was love. Until there wasn't.

_Pain takes my heart's place_

_The love we made_

_We can't erase it_

_Don't wanna face it_

He regretted it, of that she was certain. Why else would he have left her? It didn't matter that he had never rekindled his relationship with Ginny. Or that her own venture into red-haired romance fizzled before ever truly taking off. She remembered what he had told Ron before the war was over. Harry saw her like a sister. And it nearly killed her.

_Pitter pat, the angel on my shoulder_

_Is haunting me tonight_

_Tick tock, the clock is getting louder_

_Ready for me to decide_

They hadn't talked at all. Not really. There was a constant elephant in the room whenever one of them was in the company of the other. The pitying glances from her friends, the worried looks from her honorary godson, she tried to ignore them all. If she did not acknowledge it, then _it_ didn't exist. No matter what she know knew about That Night. Hermione Granger was no damsel in distress. If Harry didn't want her, that was perfectly adequate. She could, and would, save herself.

_I've lost my sense of right and wrong_

_Well-justified my soul to carry on_

Magic really was well and truly wonderful. She hated it. What good was being able to pack her bags and slip away like a thief in the night if her heart was left in pieces behind her? She knew her note was insufficient. Just as she knew Andromeda would show it to Harry. He was, after all, Teddy's godfather. He deserved to know why his maternal counterpart could no longer handle the job.

_It feels so damn good to write off the rules_

..oOo..

_Dear Andy____ I couldn't stay. I'm not strong enough. When he's old enough, tell Teddy that I love him to pieces. And that he deserves so much better. If you could, could you tell Harry that __I lov__ I'm sorry, too? I couldn't forget __Tha__ that night, not like he wanted me to. He'll know what you mean. It breaks my heart to go, but I'm afraid that staying may very well kill me. Give everyone my love. And know this, I leave part of me with you, and that I am content. ____Hermione_

..oOo..

_But when a new day breaks_

_I'm left a fool_

_I'm such a fool_

She fell in love with the quaint, cottage-style house she found outside of Asheville, North Carolina*. It reminded her of happier times. Happier times full of Teddy's laughter and Harry's eyes.

_Pain takes my heart's place_

_But your sweet sweet love,_

_Oh, I can taste it_

_But still can't face it_

Though her note to Andromeda was true, it wasn't the only reason she found herself with her head in the sand. Her memories were not the only lingering evidence of That Night. As the months passed her belly slowly grew. Each day she woke, washed, and berated herself for her cowardice. Gryffindor bravery, what a joke. She was now nearly six months pregnant. That meant it had been about four months since she left.

_Pitter pat, the angel on my shoulder_

_Is haunting me tonight_

_Tick tock the clock is getting louder_

_Waiting for me to decide_

Every night she dreamt of the same thing. Her memories would replay That Night. Her twenty-fourth birthday. Harry had surprised her with a birthday party at Molly's Tavern*, the newly renamed Leaky Cauldron. This was the first the group had been reunited in nearly a year.

Harry was busy with his healer apprenticeship*, having given up his aspiration of being an Auror along with his role as the Chosen One. Neville was at Hogwarts teaching Herbology, Luna in Switzerland searching for another evasive, and undiscovered, creature , Ginny in Wales, playing for the Harpies, and she was at Oxford, studying law. That they could all find the time off was rare. Then again, something was different about that night.

Maybe it was the way he looked at her, the way Harry never seemed to leave her side. It was around midnight; the music had just switched to a crooning ballad, when Harry asked her to dance. He might as well have given her wings and asked her to fly. It was magical. As simple and uninventive the description was to those of her world that was the only word that could apply. When the song was over, it was only natural he lead her up to his room. Only natural…..

_The sun is coming down on me_

_Could fate be so unkind?_

Speak of the devil, and he shall appear. No sooner had Hermione conjured his image in her mind was Harry standing before her. This Harry, however, was no figment of her imagination. No specter of her memories. The torrential fury, righteously pouring from his eyes gave way to frozen bewilderment. At first she wondered why, and then his gaze moved down. She was standing, and her protruding stomach was clearly visible. The fury returned.

_Pain takes my heart's place_

_The love we made remains_

"Harry "

"No, Hermione," Harry sighed, the anger draining out of him, "It's clear we have nothing to say to each other. I honestly wish you every happiness. I've lost my chance, and I can see that now. Tell him he's a lucky man, whoever he is,"

"Harry, wait!"

"Goodbye," Harry replied as he turned to walk out the door he'd entered only moments before.

A jet of light flew over his right shoulder, effectively locking the door.

"Harry," Hermione sighed, absentmindedly rubbing her stomach, "You're not leaving. We need to talk."

_Pitter pat, the angel on my shoulder_

_Is haunting me tonight_

_Tick tock, the clock is getting louder_

_Ready for me to decide_

"Harry….where do I start? There is no one else. There's never been anyone else. This is our baby, I "

"Hermione, stop," He interrupted.

She was afraid to look up, knowing he was about to leave again. She kept her eyes lowered, watching her hand move over her baby. The feeling of a hand grasping her chin had her flinching, but Harry continued to lift her head so he could see her eyes.

"I was angry, earlier. I'm not anymore. What happened, it was both of our faults. Come home, 'Mione. Everyone misses you. Ev-even me. Come home, so we can be a family.

_The angel on my shoulder_

_Is haunting me tonight_

_Tick tock, the clock is getting louder_

_Ready for me to decide_

Later that night, as they lay, sated, in each other's embrace, Hermione placed Harry's hand on her naked stomach. He could feel the child beneath, squirming about.

"I love you, Harry. That's why I left. I couldn't I couldn't stay."

"I know. And I love you, too, Hermione. That's why I couldn't let you go."

_Come on, Angel_

_Angel._

The End.

..oOo..

*The cottage I imagined is a real house. Here's the link to see it [put hyphens in for the spaces]

/stone cottage in asheville north carolina/

*This was an idea I had. Since all of her children are grown up and moved out, the twins and Harry bought the Leaky Cauldron for Molly. She now manages it. And yes, I said twins. Fred is not dead.

*I honestly don't see Harry wanting to be an Auror. I definitely see him helping people, but I think he'd be ready to be done fighting the bad guys.


End file.
